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Blonde Jokes that will actually make you laugh blonde jokes

There are two blonds on a river.

Blond #1 is on the first side of the river.

Blond #2 is on the second side of the river.

Blond #2 shouts "How do I get to the other side of the river?!"

Blond #1 replies "You already are!"


Blonde: “What does IDK mean?”

Brunette: “I don’t know.”

Blonde: “OMG, nobody does!”


A guy was driving in a car with a blonde.

He told her to stick her head out the window and see if the blinker worked.

She stuck her head out and said, "Yes, No, Yes, No, Yes..."


How do you confuse a blonde?

Put her in a circle and tell her to sit in the corner.

"May I take your order?" the blonde waitress asked.

"Yes, how do you prepare your chickens?"

"Nothing special sir," she replied, "we just tell them straight out that they're going to die."

What do you call it when a blonde dyes her hair brunette?

Artificial intelligence!!


There was a blonde driving in the country side when she went around the corner and saw an ocean of wheat fields.

Then she saw a blonde in a row boat frantically paddling.

The blonde driver yelled out, "Hey! It's blondes like you that give blondes like me a bad name and if I knew how to swim, I'd swim out there and kick your ass!"


Death: It's your time. Give me your hand

Blonde: No! I know that if I don't touch you then I'll never die!

Death: Holy shit! You figured out the key to living forever! You're soooo smart! High five!

Blonde: *high fives*

Death: Typical blonde... Dumbass...


A blonde, a redhead, and a brunette were all lost in the desert one time.

They’d just about given up hope of making it out alive when they found a lamp and rubbed it.

Funnily enough, a genie popped out and said they could each have one wish which would come true.

The redhead wished to be back home and poof! She was back home.

The brunette wished to be at home with her family. Poof! She was back home with her family.

The blonde said, “Awwww, I wish my friends were here.”